The Academic Issues of the High School Years

A common lament I hear repeatedly, is that today’s educational system is not providing our young people with what parents consider to be an acceptable education. I am not qualified to identify the guilty parties in this issue, but I will insist that a successful education for our teenagers needs to follow the team approach. We are in the midst of the Stanley Cup playoffs in hockey, and those of us who are hockey fans know that winning a hockey game requires more than just great offensive scorers! The defensive players have to do their job to keep the puck away from their goalie, and the goalie has to have a keen eye and lightning-quick reflexes to block any shots that do come his way. It is said that a thread of three strands is not easily broken, and I have noticed that a hockey team that is strong in all three areas is a powerful one!

The successful education of a teenager also needs to be a three-way team effort. The players are the student, the parents and the teachers. All three have to work together to ensure success. Parents cannot afford to let the responsibility for education rest with the student and the teacher. Parents need to let the teachers know that they want to be involved. I recall that when my daughter was still in high school, a teacher-parent interview day was scheduled each semester. Despite the fact that Christine was always an excellent student (she is an engineer), it honestly didn’t enter my mind that I didn’t need to attend these events.

It took me a good two years however, before I finally clued in to why her teachers seemed a bit bewildered or confused at my appearance. I remember going up to her math teacher in 11th grade to introduce myself, whereupon he said "but Christine is doing fine!" I replied "I know that, I just came to thank you, and see if there is anything I can do at home to support her in her work." His surprised look told me that teachers often don’t expect to see the parents of the students who are doing well. What a shame!

Teachers should expect ALL parents to attend these meeting, regardless of whether their child is doing well in that particular subject or not. If my child had NOT been doing well, that would not have been our first meeting! Parents need to establish a relationship with the teachers at the first sign of a struggle with a particular subject, to find out what the expectations are for the student. Ideally, the parent and the student should meet with the teacher together, to ensure they both hear the same message. 

Will your teenager be delighted that you want to meet with the teacher? Highly unlikely! But if this has been the pattern throughout elementary school, it won’t seem so awkward. I cannot stress the importance of this enough: if the teacher realizes that the parent is an ally on the same team, he or she will be much more comfortable communicating with you about your teenager’s status. In the upper years of high-school, you may no longer feel a need to visit the teacher, but will still want to stay in contact with an occasional note. 

It is also the parents’ responsibility to provide an environment at home that is conducive to learning. Proper nutrition, a place to work that is well-lit and quiet is also important. Some people do enjoy having some background music on, and find it isn’t a distraction. Others need to have a really quiet workplace. This can also vary depending on the task to be completed. I need complete quiet to be creative, but love to have music on for more routine tasks. It is important for the teenager to determine what kind of environment they need, and for the parents to support them in this.

A source of conflict often arises around the issue of the "part-time job". Personally, I would only allow a teenager to have a job if their grades are high enough to justify the time spent away from studying. Unfortunately, the part-time job that seems to provide spending money and freedom, often robs the young person of the ability to study effectively and get enough rest. I am a fan of the summer job, but not of the after-school and evening job, unless it is restricted to a maximum of two evenings a week and one day on the weekend. For the majority of teenagers, it is not possible to do well in high school, have a part-time job and still have time for recreation, family activities and friends.

I realize that for many families, the extra income a teenager brings in is necessary to supplement the family budget. However, that seems to be a very small percentage of cases. More often, the extra money is spent on "stuff" that is a "want" and not a "need". Surely I am not the only parent whose children have a better sound system than I do?

There is no doubt that steering a teenager through the high school years can be a challenge. However, it is another of life’s situations where the rewards for our efforts in these years, can pay off with huge dividends in the future!